When You Are Missing your Perfect Duty Station

When You Are Missing your Perfect Duty Station

Moving away from a duty station when you’ve established a life there can be hard. We as humans tend to identify one place as home, the place where we feel most like ourselves. As military folk it’s always a gamble as to whether you’ll be able to make new friends, establish yourself in a new job, or even like where you’re living from year to year. So, it is a treasure when you get all that and more in a new place.  Ultimately, you cannot stay there forever, so it’s natural that when it’s time to move you feeling heartbroken and disconnected for a bit. It’s hard to start over repeatedly, so if you begin to feel like it’s becoming too much, here are some tips that have helped me through the 20+ years of moving around I’ve done thanks to the Navy.

Understand the Problem

Sometimes, people don’t’ want to admit that they miss the place they feel is their “home”, the place they want to be in and stay at forever if the military allows. To help come to terms with the sorrow you may feel the first step is to admit that there is a problem. That you loved the place you were, and that you would like to live there again. There’s no shame in that.  The military doesn’t care if you’re sad that you must pick up your life and move to place you don’t want to. But I’m sure your family and friends care! If you’re feeling anxious about your new home or isolated, this is most likely homesickness. And that’s fine. It’s natural.

Talk about It

It always helps to talk it out with someone.  The good thing about military life is that our worlds are very small. I’m sure there is someone stationed in the same area as you that may have been stationed in the place that you miss, or that is even from there! In this new post COVID world, you can reconnect with your friends back in that place easily thanks to technology. Talking to family, catching up with old friends or making new ones to talk about the place that connected you together in the first place is a good way to relieve some of the anxiety you may be feeling about your new home and help ease the change.

Get Familiar with the New

I remember when we moved from Annapolis, MD to Groton, CT... I was not happy about that AT ALL!!  I loved Annapolis so much and did not have a good impression of that area of Connecticut so not looking forward to the move was an understatement.  We weren’t there for too long, but what helped me see the beauty of the New London area was to go out and explore it! Spreading out your adventures when you get to your new duty station really gives you a better feel for the area that you wouldn’t get when just visiting there for a night. As for me in Connecticut, I really got a chance to get to know the area and you know what…. it’s not bad! The local food? Love it. Finding the spots where I felt most at peace was good for my soul. Familiarizing myself with my new surroundings helped me feel less stressed about being so far away from my friends and family. 


Remind Yourself of the Old

If your new place wherever it may be could give you the same feeling that your old home did, then it would do wonders for your well-being. The fastest way to get your new house to feel like home is through the scent. One smell can trigger hundreds of different memories, so if your place smells like you remember, it will begin to feel like you want it to.


Fair Winds Candles are custom scented candles that are designed to help people get through their moves from duty station to duty station.  Some of these candles are inspired by the signature scents of each duty station one may be assigned to while in the U.S. Navy. The Duty Station scented candles can help you feel right at home, no matter where you are in the world.

Learn more about how we’re making ‘scents’ of Navy life by clicking here.

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